Mommy, why does your belly sag?

Photo by Charity Woods

The room darkens around me and a bright light shines from below to cast fearful shadows across my face as I turn around to answer this question as sweetly through my teeth as one possibly can, “My sweet, innocent, blessing, my body has many features that I consider trophies and battle scars. My body tells the story of the good, the bad and the ugly of motherhood.” All the while the devil on my shoulder is screaming, “YOU!! YOU DID THIS TO ME YOU SPAWN OF SATAN!”

I am a plus-sized momma. As the years move on, I am realizing that more things sag. But as I tell you this, let me also let you in on a little secret… come closer…*whispers* I have always been plus sized. Go ahead, let that sink in. I have never been what the world considers as thin, but I have, for the most part, been healthy. I have always been considered a “big” girl, and that part I am okay with. Even when I was working out several hours a day and eating the right foods, I never made it to my ideal weight according to the charts out there. Honestly, I don’t care where they place me. I have small goals like being able to keep up with my kids playing outside without losing my breath. There are things I want to accomplish, not figures I want to keep.My heart breaks when I see how women are shamed by the body that God has given them. I use to tell myself, “I’m too fat to go to the gym.” Wait.. what? That thought doesn’t even make sense to me now. It is almost like saying I’m too hungry to go to dinner.

Kids say the darndest things and sometimes we are taken aback by some things they ask and say.  Regardless of what the answer is, we should always make sure that speak to our kids with compassion and acceptance. I don’t want to tell them that anyone is to blame, but I also don’t want to say that this is just how it is. My usual response goes along these lines: Every body that is created is different than all the others before it. We are all unique in our own ways and we can’t compare ourselves to others. But it is our job to take care of our body, If you eat a lot of junk, that is not good for your health, but there are unhealthy skinny people and healthy plus sized people.

Acceptance of where we are is the first step in bettering ourselves. If we stay in denial, we won’t have a reason to change. On our recent family vacation, I found myself running off a kids ride because I couldn’t fit. Of course this had two reasons, my legs were to long and my tummy was too big. Now, I could have cried over it and let it ruin my day, or I can accept that if I want to ride any rides, which honestly I hate doing, then I would have to change something.

In conclusion, I believe that women should stop forcing themselves into molds that they will never be happy in. As you get older, things sag and stretch. It is okay to embrace your age. Don’t let what you look like define who you are as a person. You are beautiful just the way you are. As long as you are comfortable with who you are, that is all that matters.

Have your kids ever made comments about your body that made you think of a response really quick? How do you handle those questions and brutal honesty from your kids? Let me know in the comments below!

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